Somebody Stop Danny Gans

Danny Gans, Entertainer of the Year, according to...uhhh...somebody I guess. One of the biggest mysteries of Las Vegas, a place that prides itself on being hip, is Danny Gans. I've never seen his act. I can't say it's bad. I'm sure it's great...but where did he come from? How did he become the "Entertainer of the Year"? And why do I laugh uncontrollably everytime I'm in Vegas and see his billboard? These are just some of the questions surrounding Danny Gans, who is cleary, part of the next Vegas "Rat Pack." Alongside Steve Gutenberg, Phil Donahue and all of the MTV I Wannabe A VJ Contest winners. If only The Sands still existed, the new group of classic entertainers would have a chance at a terrific photo op. As far as I'm concerned, Danny Gans can be the "Entertainer of the Year," It's cool. But my real problem is with his website. The Danny Gans website is one of the worst I've ever seen. Why? Is it the design? Is it Danny himelf? Is it the content? Nope. It's the stupid Austin Powers impression audio clip that plays when you open the site. Check it out. It's not that his impersonation is that bad (although it's no Mike Meyers), it's that he is actually doing an Austin Powers impersonation and that it's on his front page and plays, everytime you load the page! Uhhhhh? How old is that movie, and has an impression of Austin Powers, by anybody, ever really been that funny anyway? How can the Mirage allow him to do this? We are talking Vegas here people. But you know what? I probably would have been drunk sometime in Vegas and stumbled into his show as a joke. I would have given it that chance...but after seeing his site, I can't even allow Drunk Blogger to do that. (Granted, if I did visit his show in Vegas, I would be heckling him and try to go up on stage, but still, I would have bought a ticket. And that's all that mattas in this bizness! Right?) But I digest (I know it's digress). How do we fix this problem? It's simple...a petition. Of course, it's not a petition in the traditional sense. I'm not going to even try to circulate it anywhere, or even remember that I wrote this tomorrow, but hey, it's the thought the counts. So here is the ultimatum: Danny Gans, unless you stop using the Austin Powers impersonation when your website opens, I will be forced to call Michael Moore, the Supersize Me guy, Tina Fey, Bill O'Reilly, Ludacris, Geraldo Rivera, Ann Coulter, Hillary Clinton, and the guy who said the youth vote was going to win the 2004 election, and I'm going to tell all of them to make this a nationwide, mainstream issue. Of course, none of them will respond to my calls, but hey, that's America for ya, sometimes even a genius like me, the future of entertainment gets rejected. So, as I was typing, to sign the petition, please respond to this post with a comment. Leave your name, location, age, political affiliation and then delete your political affiliation. The Danny Gans website - it has to be stopped! Random Danny Gans Fun Fact of the Day: Danny Gans played a baseball player in the 1988 classic baseball flick, Bull Durham. His riveting performance was inspired by his real-life experience in the minors! Awesome!