Man, Popcorn Just Doesn't Cut It No More

Have you noticed? Popcorn just ain't cuttin' it no mo, man. Iz eatz so muchz popcornz, that Iz don't knowz what iz good and what iz crap. Hear me know: I eat popcorn. I don't likez it no more. I eat it for fun, but it's not number one. Eat it with a Diet Pepsi, it makes it somewhat better. Eat it in the cold, you best be wearin' a sweater. You eat it with grapes...nah, don't eat it with grapes. Thank you. I wanted to write the worst thing possible.