Jesse Metcalf Plays Basketball at 24-Hour Yo

Who cares? I sure don’t. I thought somebody would think it’s cool though or something. Eva Longoria is pretty hot though so I think I’ll talk about her. Apparently Jesse Metcalfe plays John Rowland, the gardener who is “hooking up” with Eva. That’s such bull-ish. Does Jesse Metcalfe give Eva Longoria Valentine Day Flowers or Valentine’s Day…12 times a year? No. Does Jesse Metcalfe buy 15 Valentine’s Day gift baskets for Eva…twice on Valentine’s Day? No. Does “the constant gardener” buy Ms. Tony Parker (which is a fake relationship because she is really with me) a pinata full of diamond bracelets for Cinco De Mayo? Hell no.Oh by the way, have you been involved in any accutane lawsuits lately? Well if Eva Longoria was fighting an addiction to accutane that necessitated a lawsuit and Eva had no money left, even from Desperate Housewives, because she spent it all and sold all of her stuff to get some accutane, would Jesse Metcalfe get her a lawyer? No way…but I would.