The Benefits of Being Nocturnal

It's 3:55 AM Pacific Standard time. I just got off work an hour ago and I was and still am wide awake. I don't see myself getting to sleep anytime soon. You've got to love Hollywood! Anyway, as crazy as it may seem, there are some advantages to this bullshit:

• I always catch the morning news live...on the East Coast. (what a knee slapper that was)
• Getting to sleep in is never a problem, although when you do it everyday, it does get old.
• I can enjoy a number of late night infomercials that I otherwise would not see. I can learn how to get rich with my pyramid scheme of choice or by selling real estate. I can't wait until I can become financially independant for doing absolutely nothing and an infomercial interviews me too with a golf course or swimming pool as the backdrop.
• I can still watch Conan O'Brien thanks to NBC's Up All Night lineup. It's probably the only good thing that NBC is doing right now.
• I can chat on myspace with really hot chicks...in the Phillipines. That's always cool, except it gets kind of old when they keep asking me to "sponsor" them in the USA, whatever that means. I also get a lot of marriage proposals which is cool but it gets old explaining that I'm just not ready to settle down at this time.
• I can see commercials that for some reason aren't good enough to be aired during the day. They usually suck or feature washed-up celebrities that nobody wants to see except slightly-out-of-touch night owls like...well, not like me, but like somebody I guess.
• I have my pick of girls to date when it comes to late-night diner waitresses, female truck drivers, fast food restaurant drive-thru operators and prostitutes.
• Only 7 hours awake with sunlight a day really isn't that bad...at least I keep telling myself that.
• I never have to deal with lines at laundry mats, 7-11's or anywhere else that's open late, just people trying to mug me.
• I have plenty of time to write blogs like these. I'm not sure how, but I'm pretty sure someday they will make me exactly $10 million dollars. Want to know how? Sign-up for our free newsletter. Buy our book, our audio tape and our DVD and you too can experience financial freedom, all from the comfort of your own home, without working another day in your life and get yourself interviewed from you new successful home with swimming pool, golf course and beautiful wife. You just need to pay us $2,000 by Thursday. It works! Trust me! Just click on Make A Donation in the right hand column.

Random PSA: Also, if you are looking for wedding reception ideas you should check out the vioxx lawsuits that have been listed in the papers. I don't know how, but it will work.

Drunk Blogger could have thought of more but he actually did get tired while writing this. Now that's what I call irony...or freakin bullshit. I can't remember which.