I'm Glad I've Never Been in a K-Swiss Commercial

I know I shouldn't be picky, but I gotta admit, I am very happy that I've never been in a K-Swiss commercial. At 25, I think I've finally passed the age of eligibility for those "hip" and "cool" commercials anyway, which is probably a very good thing. It's also good that I never ended up on any of those cheesy MTV dating shows. I was even supposed to be on "Next" when I first moved to Hollywood but MTV screwed me over and I didn't get on. I think the man upstairs stepped in on that day. Seriously, it had to have been divine intervention. Somebody up there said, "Wait a minute Brian...oops, I mean "Drunk Blogger," ...Wait a minute Drunk Blogger, you aren't a completely shitty douchebag, and you don't totally suck as a person. Why are you going on this show?" I am very, very, very, very, very, very, very thankful that MTV screwed me and I didn't make it on that show. I've never been anywhere near a K-Swiss commercial. I haven't even auditioned for one. But that's because K-Swiss commercials suck, and I don't. First of all, K-Swiss shoes aren't even cool. Do you know anyone who wears them? (Besides the kids that are in the commercials that get a free pair of course.) Plus, the acting is so lame. "I wear K-Swiss, 2006." "Yo, checks out my K-Swiss homie." "Gotta have K-Swiss with my chords." "K-Swiss, for all occassions yo!" "K-Swiss, eh!" (in an absolutely horrible Canadian accent) It's just lame man. I'm just really glad I haven't been a part of these "high-quality" productions. I mean...don't get me wrong...I'd take the money...but besides that...forget it. I'm a Nike man bitch haha. I think I'm going to make a fake K-Swiss commercial where all these hip, trendy kids, wearing wristbands, stocking caps with brims and camaflouge cargo shorts, say what they ACTUALLY think about K-Swiss shoes. Except, they would say them with huge, fake smiles on their faces. The quotes would be more like: "Hey, these shoes fucking suck, but I like the residuals!" "Yo man, all my homies clown on me for wearing these Calvin-esque, K-mart shoes, but I gotsta pay the bills yo!" "Aren't I pretty? Oh yeah, K-Swiss or something." "K-Swiss, the lamest shoes, with the worst ad agency in the history of shoes!" "I fucked the Producer eh!" (in an absolutely horrible Canadian accent) Yeah...that would be more like it... Actually, I think I am actually going to do that, so don't steal the idea, or at least collaborate with me if you do. I'm going to post it here at some point, or on this site's future home DrunkBlogger.com. Of course - that's down the road though. Bonus Blog (It's a blog within a blog!): I saw "Rufio" from the movie "Hook" at my gym today. Actually, I saw him last week too, but it took 2 times seeing him to actually remember it. I threw a bunch of fake blue and green food at him and yelled, "I believe!" and then I tried to fly of the 4th floor of the Arcoylyte parking garage. That didn't really work out so well. Serially though, I did see Rufio yall. Drunk Blogger - Yes, he does sign autographs. Except he charges $20 per, and then he signs them "Jose Canseco."