A Fake-Ass Nick Cannon Verbally Attacked Me

Friday night I was enjoying a night out (getting wasted, drinking way too much and dancing with chicks) with my best friends that I grew up with who were in town visiting me from Chicago. We had a table with bottle service. We had some female friends because of that and everything was going really well and really drunk. Then, as I was walking to the bathroom, a kid who looked like a fake version or "Fake-Ass" Nick Cannon, wearing a Yankees cap, a really nice brand-new white t-shirt and jeans (and probably a chain or some other jewelry that I didn't notice) basically ran into me and said, "Move." Being the smart ass, but non-violent (for the most part) person that I am, I just started to act as if I was mentally challenged and couldn't hear him. I walked over to the line in the bathroom and said nothing. He followed me, got in my face and started yelling all this shit about how I "don't know who he is" and how I "fucked with the wrong guy" and some other cliche stuff that he probably heard on some CD or in a movie somewhere. I didn't really react. I just kind of stood there waiting for him to do something since I "fucked with him." First of all, I don't really know how I "fucked with him," or really how the whole thing even started. I was too drunk. But I do know that this guy looked like a punk version of Nick Cannon (wait, was that a double negative?) minus about 80 pounds and a foot in height. He also kind of reminded me of the rapper Ja Rule. Seriously, he could have punched me and I probably would have just laughed. Also, keep in mind, everybody else in the club was dressed nice. He was the only one dressed like a wannabe rapper and he only got in because he knew all of the promoters at the club. Kids these days. So silly. I'm still not really sure why he was trying to start a fight with me. Maybe he was jealous of my velvet blazer and of how awesome I am. I also think that the funny part about it is that I don't think I said one word during the whole thing and just stared at him and he finally walked away. I thought he was going to get some more people that I "don't know who they are" and that "I fucked with" to back him up since he clearly is the next Godfather....but he never came back. I tell you what folks, crazy things happen when you are drunk, waiting in line for the bathroom at "The Lobby" at 9077 Santa Monica Blvd. West Hollywood, CA 90069 on February 17th 2006 at approximately 1:30 AM and you are wearing a black velvet blazer, jeans and a white button-up shirt. Oh well. Apparently, Nick Cannon and Ja Rule's love child didn't realize who he was fucking with...The Drunk Blogger. The Drunk Blogger does not condone violence and wants it to be known that "The Lobby" is a great place, he just had a problem with one guy but the Drunk Blogger is smart so he squashed it and blogged about it instead.